Unfortunately, almost all of us take our definition of "school" from the limited experience of our own schooling. Whether or not we actually acknowledge it, the public school system becomes our model of how things should actually work. We presume learning is best broken up into defined subjects, that tests are the best measure of learning, that we should finish the math book each year, and most of all, that school is work...
At times it is useful to understand the intent of certain concepts, activities, or institutions by looking at where we originally got them. By looking at the (often Latin or Greek) word from which the English is derived, we can gain insight into what was done in an earlier age.
One such word is the English word School. We all home school. We buy school books, we notify WISDOM Home Schooling of our intent to home school, and at some time in our day, we decide it is school time. But what does school mean?
Unfortunately, almost all of us take our definition from the limited experience of our own schooling. Whether or not we actually acknowledge it, the public school system becomes our model of how things should actually work. We presume learning is best broken up into defined subjects, that tests are the best measure of learning, that we should finish the math book each year, and most of all, that school is work. We say, "have you finished your school work yet?"
When our children resist doing school work we become concerned that they don't want to learn. We are afraid that they will not develop self-control and other disciplines, and they will never be able to compete in the world of academics or commerce. It seems the more we push them to learn, the less they want to do it, even if they obediently (though oh so slowly) comply.
The problem is not our children as much as our own distorted view of how learning is best supported. Perhaps much of the resistance by our children comes because we are trying to entirely orchestrate something that they themselves need to do. Learning needs to happen by and in the learner. If parents were to dictate every aspect and detail of playing with Lego, they would soon have children who hate Lego.
Like Lego (or fort building, or dolls, or any pretending at all) learning comes naturally and is desirable to every child.
By breaking Lego play into first using the square blocks, then adding the long narrow ones, then introducing wheels, we would stifle a process best explored freely by the child. Nor am I suggesting the child will necessarily learn best entirely on his/her own. Your questions, suggestions, and just plain interest will help propel the rate at which Lego concepts may be explored and learned. With sensitivity to allow completion of a phase if not a whole project in Lego, you will best serve the child by then guiding him/her outside to work on the fort or the dollhouse for a while. From your perspective, you know 12 hours of Lego would limit the child's development in other areas.
Faced with a child who resists school work, I have asked many a mother, "what does he/she like to do? Almost always, the answer is, "play," the only area we as parents haven't yet taken over; therefore it is still desirable to the child.
Learning should closely resemble play. It should be eagerly and readily entered into by the child. So, what's the probem?
The problem is our definition of School. Institutionalized school was never a very good idea. (You can imagine what institutionalizing would do to play.)
School is derived from the Latin word Schola, meaning leisure devoted to learning. This is how school began, and this is how school succeeded for many centuries. Like playing with Lego, learning comes naturally, and is intrinsically enjoyed if it occurs within the context of leisure.
This definition does not in any way belittle the importance of learning. Rather, it indicates how learning is best accomplished. This definition comes from an age when everyone worked. Frankly, it is very similar to our family farm. If we were to allow it, there is sufficient work available that everyone in our family could labour all day, every day. Schola is that window of time we must budget into our day in order to give everyone a chance to set aside their jobs and spend time just learning.
Now, if schola is truly leisure, it would be inappropriate for parents to push to accomplish a certain amount of learning in the time given. If it is truly leisure, it needs to resemble other forms of leisure. If the Math book doesn't get finished this year it may be finished next. (When you get tired of water skiing, you head for shore - you don't ski the whole lake.) Carrying the analogy a little further, you may find that on the first few trips to the lake your child refuses to water ski. Somewhere along the way someone convinced him it was work, so he's resisting it. That's fine, let him build sand castles instead, but keep the skiing idea alive. It is natural for him to rise to a challenge and desire to succeed. The honest effort he will be willing to put in to any leisure, be it skiing or Math will be the ingredient necessary for successful learning.
But what about teaching discipline? How will my child develop acceptable character, if he/she can take learning casually? Well, first of all, notice how diligently a child applies himself to Lego, or herself to skiing, or horse training, or fort building. It may take a while, because school has come to mean work to your child, but once it truly becomes leisure, the student will dig in and concentrate just as with play. Secondly, school should not be the place where you teach character any more than you teach character at play (manners, charity,...). Rather, diligence, obedience, determination, self-control,... are best taught at work. If practise is needed in these areas, unhook the dishwasher, plant a garden, raise chickens, build a boat, help neighbours, volunteer in the nursing home, whatever can be done in your environment to do "meaningful work alongside an adult." This is the place to develop discipline.
"But what if my child wants to be an engineer, a doctor...? Surely learning will eventually need to become work." Studying medicine is a great challenge academically, however the greatest challenge is not the learning, but the discipline to set aside the time to learn. For now, the parent is the source of that discipline, not by insisting that a certain amount of learning be accomplished each day, but that a certain amount of TIME be assigned to the leisure of learning. This is time that will not be spent on work or play. It is time for learning. Eventually, perhaps long after home schooling is over, and especially if specific personal goals emerge, the student will take on the responsibility of maintaining this window of time in a daily regimen.
How then did our society get mired in an education system that turned leisure into work? The first schools were not this way at all; they were charities. Educated individuals, usually upper class ladies, extended assistance to the children of illiterate parents in order to teach these children the basics of reading and numbers. Only an hour or two per week was sufficient to teach these children who were happy to have some leisure devoted to learning, and quickly mastered the basics of reading, writing, and arithmetic. Everything else, they learned at home. When government became involved in schooling, other motives began to appear. Most evident was the notion that beyond the 3-R's there was a need to prepare children for the world of work. In the wake of the industrial revolution it seemed beneficial to use schools to prepare children for the factory assembly line: sit quietly, follow orders, regurgitate what you have been delivered, and aim for external rewards. Over time, other motives have emerged, each taking schools further and further from homes.
The solution is to see schooling for what it really means, discover that this definition has grown out of centuries of successful experience, and attempt to apply this reality to our own homes. A home school that is unthreatened by demands for specific methodology and results can capitalize upon the nature of the child. If parents maintain a lifestyle that continues to provide that window of leisure devoted to learning, and remember to keep it leisurely, they will not only enjoy this year more, but they will see greater results in the learning their children achieve.